South Africa « Westside Family Church Missions Trips

South Africa March 2007

The Westside Missions Trip to South Africa in March was simply an amazing experience. I thought that I knew Africa. I lived in Sierra Leone and Uganda, and I have studied African History and Third World Development and Support. However, I had no idea….

We were very well prepared for this trip, I must say. We had 4 training sessions prior to leaving for South Africa – our goal was to present HIV/AIDS awareness and abstinence programs in 3 of the schools in the Motherwell Township. Halfway into the pre-trip training, I felt that people were getting a good exposure to the situation, the biology of HIV/AIDS, and the moral importance of abstinence. Our volunteers were now able to say all of those uncomfortable words involved with this discussion. We were basically giving “the talk” to hundreds of middle and high-school aged kids, in a classroom and general assembly format.

Nine of our group of thirty-two arrived in Port Elizabeth, South Africa, (from Atlanta, via Senegal, to Johannesburg) on a Thursday evening. After a bit of a struggle with the rental car agency, we finally made it to our lovely B & B. Our group of nine had the job of finalizing some last minute logistics for the week. Friday was a relaxed day – after a lovely English breakfast and a leisurely walk, we headed over to the Oceans of Mercy Children’s Village. For those of you not familiar with this organization, Oceans is a non-profit that currently cares for 12 AIDS orphans in a lovely section of Port Elizabeth, Theesecombe. These kids live in a lovely 4 bedroom home surrounded by 5 acres of farm land.

Mama Gladys Panda is the director of care, and she has the help of 4 full time care givers. The kids range from 2 to 18 years of age. They moved from Motherwell Township, where they lived with Mama Gladys in a 2 room home, to this house just 2 years ago. Mama Gladys is the most amazing person I have met. She has a 3^rd grade education but the heart of a giant. She has lived a tough life of childhood abuse, married an alcoholic, and has some tough family circumstances to deal with. 4 of the Oceans children are her daughter’s children, all of them with different fathers. She has always been a magnet for children in trouble, and has never turned any of them away. That is her mission — looking out for kids in trouble. She volunteers for a teenage pregnancy center—one of the babies living at Oceans is the result of her convincing a young woman not to have an abortion. Her compassion is indescribable. You simply have to be in her presence to feel the empathy and comfort that she gives. She is so good at this because she has lived it herself….

After a couple hours of playing with the kids, we were off to the “Farm School.” This is a 3 room school of about 50 kids who live in the nearby squatter’s camp. The Farm School has been adopted by Ron and Sybil Colin, Schaun Colin’s parents. Over the last year, they have been visiting the school, helping to supply shoes and uniforms (the first shoes that some of these kids have ever had), They are always on the lookout for good food deals from the local grocery stores. We brought some lunch and met the kids—had an impromptu Vacation Bible School with them before we left.

After that, we had to move from the small B & B to Seaview Resort—this is a resort located in the middle of a game reserve. They have a chapel on a hill and the view is spectacular. You can see the Indian Ocean from there. We had to move to the larger resort because the remaining 23 of our group was joining us that evening. Saturday morning, a smaller portion of our group left early to get ready for the Lubabalo Care Training In-service. This was our attempt at training 12 people, hand chosen by Mama, in the basics of HIV/AIDS care. It was a 1.5 day training that was designed to give credentials to this preselected group of folks. These ladies (and 2 gentlemen) have already been working with Mama in the Motherwell and Markman Townships. They keep their eyes open for especially vulnerable children—kids whose parents have both died from AIDS and who have no familial tie with any adult in this world. The literature refers to them as “Orphans and Vulnerable Children” or OVC’s. These groups of kids are often referred to as Child-Headed Households. Literally, the oldest sibling becomes responsible for their younger brothers and sisters. These are the most vulnerable. They are easy prey in an adult world of extreme poverty, unemployment, and the unchecked pandemic of HIV. Lubabalo is Xhosa and means “grace”. These ladies have also been involved in Oceans’ Child Sponsorship Program, following up on monthly delivery of food packets, etc…

The Lubabalo training session went very well for the first day. With the help of an interpreter, Zach and I were able to get the main points across. These women had first hand experience dealing with all of the things that we were talking about. They knew first hand from watching their family members slowly die of AIDS. The have seen first hand the terrible stigma involved with this, the fear of testing, the fear of going to the clinics. More than once we heard about stories of people being “outed” (their HIV status being revealed against their wishes) and then being kicked out of the house, ostracized by the family, having to relocate to the next township…. And the majority of these people were the victim of circumstance, they were HIV + after being raped or were children who were infected by their mom. (Rape and sexual abuse is a huge problem in South Africa. 1 of 2 women is raped during the course of their lifetime in South Africa. Child rape is especially troubling; there is a myth that sex with a virgin will cure you of aids…) So these trainees knew much more than we, the instructors….

The rest of the group had a work day at Oceans house. That evening, we had our first debrief at the Seaview Chapel. Each of our debriefs consisted of some worship, music, and review of highs and lows. Finally we had the bead ceremony: everyone had the chance to bead someone. Red beads were for leadership, yellow for ‘stretching out of your comfort zone’, green for compassion, and white for service. So this group of 32 strangers became very emotionally tied to one another through the beadings.

“I was part of the problem, and I’m sorry,”
Sunday morning was perhaps the most moving part of my trip. We had a leisurely breakfast and then we were off to the Seaview church. Seaview is also the name of the local squatter’s camp, and their church was erected in October of the previous year by the last Oceans Mercy trip. The building could best be described as a shed. The wooden support poles were sunk into concrete, and the walls were thin metal, with an opening near the roof for circulation, with a dirt floor. Schaun gave some opening remarks, apologizing for our casual dress. He informed us at breakfast, that although these people were extremely poor, (living on less than $1 per day), they would be in their best dress on Sunday. He warned us that this would be hot, smelly, physically uncomfortable experience, lasting perhaps 3 hours, and that our body language should not give the impression that we didn’t want to be there. There would be people at church this morning, he said, to check out the white people. And maybe next week these same people would come back. Our role was very important… The faith and dedication that people living this kind of life is so truly humbling. It was amazing to feel the emotion—people crying and praying for people who had recently died. Their hurt was very tangible. You could feel it, you were surrounded by it….

There were 2 pastors at this church. Schaun started off by talking about the trip in October, where he and the local pastor worked side by side, poured the concrete cornerstone of the church, and now it was an established church in the heart of this extreme poverty. This pastor had a dream of a church, Schaun said, and now here it was. Schaun went on to preach about the vision of the mind, and the heart would follow. Nelson Mandela had the vision of a South Africa without Apartheid, and we are now in the beginnings of that South Africa. Other people have had hurtful visions, and their goals followed accordingly. Schaun went on to talk about his earlier experience as a member of the South African Army. This was mandatory for all white South Africans back then. Schaun was the ultimate bad guy—he was trained in harassment and interrogation methods… He described his personal involvement and then he made the statement: “I was part of the problem, I was part of the thing that held you down, and I’m sorry.” The wailing, the sobbing, the screaming, the moaning that followed was immense. There is a word in most African cultures that describes the emotional response that people respond with when they are told of the death of a loved one. We westerners keep that emotion inside; they let it out in all its intensity. One of the old granny’s in the church was so distressed that she almost fell over. Schaun went to her and hugged her and then sat down, his head in his hands. The local pastor then stood up and said some prayers and they asked him to come back to the front of the church to lay hands on and pray with those who chose to do so. And every local person from that church lined up to pray with Schaun. They lined up to pray and then made their way back to the back of the church, where everyone was singing and dancing. The immediate turn in emotion, from rage, sadness, hurt, despair, to one of immediate forgiveness and love and celebration is something that I will never forget. It was something that I ‘m trying to write about but will never be able to capture the essence of what we experienced. The best analogy that I heard at our bead ceremony that night was if a former Nazi soldier came to a synagogue, one that he helped to build, and said I’m sorry. This was the first time ever that these people heard “I’m Sorry.” One of the old Pa’s at the back told one of our guys, “Tonight, I will go to sleep with peace in my heart for the first time in my life.” This was such an amazing experience. It let these people start to heal from a lifetime of oppression. Vindication …

Our small training group had to leave just after that to finish the Lubabalo training session. My stomach was in knots at that point, but I was on such an adrenaline rush that I was able to finish the training. Our training for the health care workers was a bit ambitious, in hindsight, but everyone learned so much. There were several “Aha!” moments that the trainees had; they had heard the terminology of “Stage 3, Opportunistic Infections, CD4 count….” countless times, but we were able to connect some of the dots and that was very exciting to see. We trainers learned the most of all. During the first afternoon, when we were talking about the stigma involved with HIV, two of our trainees came out and revealed their HIV + status to us, strangers that they had known for only half a day. One of them described her faith and that only by the grace of God was she standing before us. We were so moved by them sharing that with us. Their faith was humbling.

Sunday evening, we wrapped up our training and then it was time to award the ladies and gentlemen with their certificate of completion. This piece of paper, along with a simple name tag and a $5.00 tote filled with first aid supplies, elevated their status beyond imagination. We of course had a great time congratulating the trainees and taking pictures of them. The confidence and credibility that they had walking away from our training was very gratifying. Mama has since told me that these Lubabalo Care Workers are indeed working so very hard in the Townships. They are not even being paid at this point; their own dedication and empathy is what drives them in this work. Monday was a shift to the school programs. We had put much preparation into this: our volunteers had written a booklet called “Choose Life,” which directed young students towards the future, the big picture of their lives. With poverty, HIV, abuse, neglect, and such a lack of opportunity surrounding these young people, we often see a “here and now” mindset that makes abstinence training especially unpopular. But we gave it our best effort. The program was a 2 day event; our main presenter, Zachary, had a 30 minute general assembly where he spoke the basics of HIV/AIDS and how to prevent transmission. After this, we broke up into teams of 1 to 2 people and spent time in the classrooms, answering questions. At the end of the day, we had the students fill out the “Dear Mama” letters—these were anonymous opportunities for the students to ask anything about anything. Monday afternoon we reviewed the Dear Mama letters and this was a very sobering thing. “I think that AIDS will kill the whole world….I wish that I was not a girl; boys don’t have it so hard….I was raped by my uncle and I am afraid to tell my mom…..I was raped last week by the soccer team star—I’m afraid of being tested….I am so afraid to confront the person who infected me…..I am more than a piece of paper (How HIV status is revealed to a person)….I want to kill myself sometimes…..Thank you for letting me write this letter….. “ There was nothing to prepare us for experiencing the depth of sexual abuse, neglect, and fear that these young kids (middle-school and high-school aged) are living with.

We went back to the schools the next day with the intent of answering some of the common themes that came up in these letters. We had a second morning in the same classrooms, no longer the novel white people, but hopefully someone that could be trusted…. We had an especially stressful situation in one of the schools, Coega Primary. After Zach’s general assembly, one of our volunteers witnessed a male teacher groping 3 young girls as they walked by in the courtyard. Evidently teacher-student abuse is a huge problem in South Africa. That same volunteer was later approached by a young girl named Pam. Pam confided in our volunteer that she was raped 3 years ago by her uncle. She now had a baby from this rape, and she was terrified for herself and her baby. Her question to us was how could she get tested and now be ostracized by her family and thrown out on the street. She would then have to leave school to take care of her 3 year old. We were talking with her when Mama Gladys waved from across the courtyard. I walked Pam over to Mama and they had a long talk in one of our vans. Mama got all of her information and assured her that she would be helped. It was so amazing to see Mama Gladys in action: “It’s OK, baby, it will be ok, We will help you get tested. Don’t tell your mom; Even if you are HIV +, you will not go through this alone….” I saw Mama pick up a starfish and she was going to throw her back into the water. Amazing.

One of the results of our Lubabalo Health Care worker training was the fact that 4 of our trainees were teachers and one principle in these school systems. Now we could tell the students that if they did not have anyone to turn to, these Lubabalo Care workers were “safe people” to turn to. That was one thing that was identified from the Dear Mama letters, people were so afraid to talk to anyone, even their own mothers, for fear that they would be ostracized, neglected, thrown out on the streets. Now the students (they were referred to as learners) had another person to approach. I wonder how many learners have come to the Lubabalo’s in the past week since we have been home.

Wednesday morning, we were able to sleep in a bit and then had a 3 hour debriefing/bead ceremony. Although it lasted 3 hours, most will tell you that it seemed more like 20 minutes. We started out basically as 32 strangers, now it seemed like you had known everyone for so long…. Wednesday afternoon was a work day/hang-out day at the Village. Most of the guys worked on maintenance issues, replacing duct tape with hammer and nail, doing small repairs, working on the electric fence that surrounds the property. Wednesday night was also the “good-bye night” for 22 of our group. The following day, they were leaving for a day/night safari, and then from there would be traveling to the airport to get back home. That evening was so emotional—people had developed such a strong attachment to the Oceans kids, especially the little ones. This was equally hard for them; some of these faces they see only once or twice a year, and most they will never see again. In their young lives of abandonment and neglect, we were one more adult leaving them after a short period of time. Mama has said that the re-adjustment that these kids go through the week after we leave is really hard on them. The evening was an impromptu Evangelical event in the truest African tradition, with song, dance, prayer, and testimony. Mama could also add the title of preacher to her hat. I was lucky because I knew that I didn’t have to say good bye for several more days. Thursday was a work day for Traci, Becky, and me. We were able to meet with Hope Worldwide, a non-profit that provides much of the medical, HIV testing, and counseling services in the Motherwell townships. I learned so much from them; we now have a good model to go from in future Lubabalo care training sessions. We also moved out of Seaview guest home back to our quaint little B & B. It took more than one trip to transfer all the luggage and goods from the large resort to our B & B. I got to know Becky Colin a bet better during this afternoon. She was always looking to “drop off” things at the roadside for the people living in the squatters camps. She had acquired some pieces of counter top that she dropped off on the road, knowing that the people there could put this to use. We had also learned of another “favor” that Becky did in the early 90’s when she was living in South Africa. They were house-sitting for some friends, and with that job came the use of a second vehicle. So while Schaun was at work, Becky had a vehicle. She took Courtney, then only 1 year old, to have tea with a friend. She noticed that her friend’s “domestic” was crying. Turns out that she had just lost her mother, and the family could not come up with the money to buy the death certificate, which then releases the body to the family. Becky talked to this lady for a bit, and then took her in her van to the police station, where she paid for the death certificate. She then drove to the morgue and they loaded the coffin in the back of the van. They were then off to the township for the family ceremony and grave site service. Schaun was at first furious with her; she put herself in harm’s way by doing this, but later realized that it was the most compassionate thing that she could have done. Becky was amazing—she was always on the look out for dropping things off at the side of the road—clothes, juice boxes, flashlights….

Friday the Colin and Noak families were off to Botswana for a one week safari vacation. That left Traci, Sherri and I to finally go shopping! We managed to find the vendors at the beachfront of Port Elizabeth, and had a good time bartering for our stuff. Bartering is an art that requires much patience and time. You have to make like you are best friends with the vendors, then discuss and debate the price for 30 minutes before agreeing on a price…. We had a good time.

Saturday we had the chance to do some more shopping and also to tour one of the oldest orphanages in South Africa. This home was in downtown Port Elizabeth; they had over 130 children living there. These kids were all court-appointed, with parental rights terminated…. Even those in the upper class of South Africa are dealing with a huge orphan problem….

Sunday we were off to the airport and our long journey home began. We made it to Johannesburg airport without any problems. After a 4 hour wait, we made it onto our flight to Dakar, Senegal, to Atlanta, and after missing our connections in Atlanta, finally to MCI. We were traveling almost 48 hours….

But it is good to be home and I am so grateful for the opportunity for this trip.

Love